Song of Joy to the KING of Kings

Like Waking Up....

2012-01-22T04:52:00.005-05:00

I've written quite a bit on this blog about my battle with bipolar disorder. Unless God chooses to heal me, it is a part of my every day life. There is a big part of me that would love nothing more than for God to heal me and to once again return to a "normal life." There is a bigger part of me still that hopes He doesn't heal me this side of heaven. I fear that if He did choose to make my brain function properly again, that I would forget how desperately I need Him every moment of every day. I am a forgetful creature you see, and learn things best when I am in the most difficult places. I think that speaks more to my hard-headed pride than anything else, but it is nonetheless true. I also believe that our loving and constant heavenly Father, is far more concerned with our spiritual healing (making us more and more dependent upon and like Jesus Christ) than He is with physical healing in this life here on earth. That is real love.

Over the past 4 1/2 years I've grown somewhat accustomed to the cycle of the disorder. A period of deep depression followed by a high-energy/sleepless "manic" phase, and then about 2 weeks of "normal" before the cycle starts all over again. I went off of my medication recently (with my Doctor's approval) because Justin and I would really like to have a baby, and the medicine I was taking would be harmful to our unborn child. Being off of my medication has been different than I expected. My manic phases are much less intense, my normal phases are longer, but my depressed phases are deeper, darker, and longer. I am just coming out of one of these 2+ week depressed phases and this brings me to the title of the blog. Whenever I come out of these dark times, it's like waking up from a really bad, way too real dream. It's like the sun never rose all those mornings I was "asleep" and there was just darkness, fear, self-loathing, desperation, and what FEELS very much like Godlessness. I can't sense God at all during these times, and I don't necessarily mean that in just a touchy feely sort of way. I mean I know and believe He's there and that He has not changed, but it literally FEELS as though He has turned His back toward me and is beyond disappointed and angry with me. That's what makes "waking up" so very glorious. It's as though the sun comes out again, God has turned back around and He's smiling at me, He's pleased with me and His arms are wide open once again. Everything that seemed dark, desolate, and lonely before is alight with color, joy and friendship. It seems almost akin to waking from the dead.

I write this because I feel that God impressed it upon my heart to do so. The point of it all being that what we FEEL and what is true are often to VERY different things, praise God! No matter what I feel, or how dark and lonely life seems to get, my Abba Father's everlasting love never ceases, His mercies continue to be new every morning and I rest secure in the very palm of His hand. GREAT is His faithfulness! This and only this are what keep me putting one foot in front of the other. God has blessed me with people in my life who speak truth to me when I can't seem to grasp it, and remind me that these dark days WILL pass. This reality gives new meaning to the verses in Psalms that talk about joy coming in the morning.

"In all things we know that we are more than conquerors. You keep us by Your love. How high, how wide, no matter where I am, healing is in Your hands. How deep, how strong, now by Your grace I stand, healing is in Your hands."

God has been more than kind to me and I am forever grateful!

Praying God's Word January 1st:

2012-01-03T23:53:00.002-05:00

"The Giant step in the walk of faith is the one we take when we decide that God no longer is a part of our lives. He is our life."

"My Father, I acknowledge that You are the Lord Almighty. You are first and You are last, and apart from You there is no other God. Make me witness to the fact that there is no other Rock but You. Enable me to say with full assurance, 'I know not one' (Isaiah 44:6,8).

You are my Lord, my Holy One, my Creator, my King. You are the One who made a way through the sea, a path through mighty waters (Isaiah 43:15-16).

You are the Lord my God. I desire to love You, listen to Your voice, and hold fast to You, for You, Lord, are my life (Deuteronomy 30:20)."

My Hopes for 2012:

2011-12-31T14:11:00.001-05:00

I have always loved the fresh and new feeling a new year holds. The chance to start with a clean slate so to speak, to grow and change for the better. A chance to set new goals and reflect on the previous year. I think looking back and reviewing how God has increased our understanding of and love for Him and provided for us is so important as a follower of Jesus Christ. Remembering where we've come from and where God's brought us increases our faith and encourages our hearts. My goals for 2012 are simple. I like to keep things simple as it's less overwhelming. ;0)

My verses for 2012: "Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should." ~ Ephesians 6:19&20

My song for 2012: 'My Desire' by Jeremy Camp...

My hopes and goals for 2012:

1.) To be more aware of God's constant presence and blessings in my life and to fall more in love with Him. I want Him to blow the roof off of my limited understanding of who He is and to be in awe of Him every day and stop taking Him for granted. I want to be thinking and talking about Him and His Word more in my every day life.

2.) I want to be a better wife...to cook more, encourage more, be more patient, love better, and be less self-centered in our marriage.

3.) I want to be kinder to and take better care of this body God has given me....eat more veggies & fruit, eat less junk, exercise at least 3 days a week....take more brisk walks outside, etc. I'd also really like to run some 5K's this summer. :0)

4.) I want to be more purposeful with my time-management, spend less time on the computer and more time reading and writing notes of encouragement, etc.

5.) I want to be a better sister and a better friend, to invest more of myself in my friends and family.

Above all else I want to grow as a daughter of the the King of kings, to become more like Jesus as I continue to become the woman He wants me to be...I am very much looking forward with an expectant hope to all that God has in store for this new year!

5 minute Friday...as inspired by my friend, Alison:

2011-11-26T02:41:00.000-05:00

I am copying this idea from my good friend, Alison whom I have had the privilege of knowing for the past 17 years. The prompt for today's post is the word grateful and I am to write for five minutes straight on that subject without editing or re-wording anything. For someone who is a perfectionist when it comes to blogging/writing, this is NO small feat. :0P I have a hard time communicating through the written word without re-reading everything I write over and over again, oftentimes ever AFTER I've hit the publish post button. I just like to make sure that I am comuunicating clearly and in the best way possible....from my heart. Ok now I have one minute to write about the actual prompt. LOL.....Grateful: I am grateful for my very favorite Thanksgiving memory/tradition that my family had practiced each year for a while now. We all sit down together at some point on Thanksgiving day and share things we are deeply thankful to God for. This year for the very first time, we also went around the circle with my 16 member family (and growing!) and shared something we appreciated and are thankful for about the person seated 2 seats over from us. I had my 14 year old baby brother Joel. There are a million things I love and appreciate about that kid, but the first thing out of my mouth was that I am thankful and look forward to getting a hug and kiss on the cheek from him every time I walk through my parent's door. How many 14 year old kids do you know who do that? I don't know ANY! #blessedfamily. :0)

Sowing Seed in the Midst of Tears...

2011-10-18T21:21:00.002-04:00

"God will give us victory, but sometimes He will require every ounce of energy and cooperation we have in the process."

"Blessed, merciful God, Your Word promises that those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. If I go out weeping, carrying seed to sow, I will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with me. (Psalm 126:5-6) Help me to see that the promise is not made to those who simply have tears but to those who are willing to sow seed in the midst of their tears. Your Word tells us in Luke 8:11 that the seed is the Word. If I'm willing to keep believing and sowing Your Word, even when I am desperately hurting, You will bring me forth from the difficult season with songs of joy. Because of Your faithfulness, with joy I will draw water from the wells of salvation." (Isaiah 12:3) ~ Beth Moore in Praying God's Word Day By Day, October 18.

Thoughts on yesterday's sermon from my journal...

2011-08-22T23:00:00.001-04:00

God is the one who gives us encouragement and endurance. (Romans 15:5.) There is no such thing as pulling ourselves up by our boot straps as Believers. If we really understand who we are as human beings and who God is as our life saver and only hope, we know we don't even have bootstraps!

"The giant step in the walk of faith is the one when we decide God is no longer part of our lives. He is our very life."

"...so I wouldn't get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then He told me, My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness. Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become."
~ II Corinthians 12:7-10 (The Message)

"Complete self-confidence is not merely a sin, complete self-confidence is a weakness."

"Self confidence should not even be a part of our vocabulary as Believers." "We put no confidence in the flesh."

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your path's straight." ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

" We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up. For even Christ did not please Himself but, as it is written: 'The insults of those who insult you have fallen on Me.' For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.
May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had, so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ... May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." ~Romans 15:1-5&13 (NIV)

"Our focus should be off of ourselves and on others."

"For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." ~Ephesians 3:14-21 (NIV)

Revelation 4

2011-05-16T08:01:00.001-04:00

I know I post this song a lot....however, it never gets old for me. I know that this is going to be our anthem in heaven, and I am more than happy to practice this anthem here on earth! I love picturing what it will be like when all of us who have trusted Jesus Christ as our Savior will kneel around the great throne in heaven worshiping Almighty God with all the angels and heavenly beings, saying....

"Holy, holy, holy
is the Lord God Almighty,’
Who was, and is, and is to come.”

" After this I looked, and there before me was a door standing open in heaven.
And the voice I had first heard speaking to me like a trumpet said,
“Come up here, and I will show you what must take place after this.”
At once I was in the Spirit, and there before me was a throne in heaven
with someone sitting on it.
And the One who sat there had the appearance of jasper and ruby.
A rainbow that shone like an emerald encircled the throne.
Surrounding the throne were twenty-four other thrones,
and seated on them were twenty-four elders.
They were dressed in white and had crowns of gold on their heads.
From the throne came flashes of lightning, rumblings and peals of thunder.
In front of the throne, seven lamps were blazing.
These are the seven spirits of God. Also in front of the throne
there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal.
In the center, around the throne, were four living creatures,
and they were covered with eyes, in front and in back.
The first living creature was like a lion, the second was like an ox,
the third had a face like a man, the fourth was like a flying eagle.
Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around,
even under its wings. Day and night they never stop saying:

‘Holy, holy, holy
is the Lord God Almighty,’
Who was, and is, and is to come.”

Whenever the living creatures give glory, honor and thanks to him
Who sits on the throne and who lives for ever and ever,
the twenty-four elders fall down before Him who sits on the throne
and worship Him who lives for ever and ever.
They lay their crowns before the throne and say:

“You are worthy, our Lord and God,
to receive glory and honor and power,
for You created all things,
and by Your will they were created
and have their being.”

~ Revelation 4 (NIV)

Be Still My Beating Heart...

2011-05-09T08:49:00.004-04:00

Dear Friends,
I write this to you to ask you to pray for me. My dear friend Kristi is writing a book about responding in a godly manner to disappointment/suffering. I met Kristi ten years ago when I was a freshmen @Baptist Bible College and she was working at the shool as the Student Activities seceretary. Kristi has been serving in Berlin, Germany as a missionary with the Association of Baptists for World Evangelism for almost 6 years now. Her ministry there is THRIVING, and God is doing some VERY exciting things through Krist in the lives of the people she is serving. God had laid it upon her heart to write a few chapters herself and then have dear brothers and sisters of hers in the Lord write chapters that deal with suffering in other areas of life. Kristi has also found it important to have all the contributers be 35 and under as she falls into that age bracket herself. Sometimes we as younger generation Christians are caught off guard and find ourselves reeling a little bit when we are hit with some of life's devastating circumstances such as disappointments due to sudden loss of close loved ones, chronic physcial illness, infertility, miscarriages, broken relationships, etc.

Long story short, Kristi asked me over a year ago to write the chapter about chronic physical illness. My first response was yes, and then came the onslaught of self doubt...."You have struggled so hard during your battle with Bipolar disorder and have often screwed up, made mistakes, sinned, doubted God's presenece with you, etc. I have voiced these fears to my Mother, and to Kristi, following with ..."but I know God wants me to do this....and this is about Him.....NOT me." God has done amazing things in me heart, thinking, life, etc. over the past 4 years since my battle with this illness began. I have shared those amazing things on my blog, in person, and in personal journals. I have prayed that God would help me to walk this road well, that He would give me the strength to honor Him, and glorify Him on this journey He has me on. Never in my life has something scared me this way, but my Heavenly Father has not given me a spirit of fear, but of love, peace, and a sound mind. Deep in my soul I know without a doubt that this is of God. He will do with what I write as He sees fit, and as I pray over every word, and ask Him to get me out of the way....He can accomplish great things! His WORD and the anchor hold He has on my life are what need to be shared. Will you pray with me? The chapter is "done" and ready for me to email to Kristi....She has had EVERY other chapter completed, edited, etc. for months and has been more than patient with me as she is excited to get it to the publisher. Please pray that it won't be authors' stories that readers will walk away remembering. Pray that they will be blown away by the person of Jesus Christ and the work He has done in each of our lives. Please pray that their lives will be saved and changed as a result. Thank you in advance for praying with me! ~ Melody Joy

Isaiah 53

2011-04-22T12:17:00.001-04:00

Isaiah 53

"Who has believed our message
and to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed?
He grew up before him like a tender shoot,
and like a root out of dry ground.
He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to Him,
nothing in his appearance that we should desire Him.
He was despised and rejected by mankind,
a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.
Like one from whom people hide their faces
He was despised, and we held Him in low esteem.

Surely He took up our pain
and bore our suffering,
yet we considered Him punished by God,
stricken by Him, and afflicted.
But He was pierced for our transgressions,
He was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on Him,
and by His wounds we are healed.
We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
each of us has turned to our own way;
and the LORD has laid on Him
the iniquity of us all.

He was oppressed and afflicted,
yet He did not open His mouth;
He was led like a lamb to the slaughter,
and as a sheep before its shearers is silent,
so He did not open his mouth.
By oppression and judgment He was taken away.
Yet who of His generation protested?
For He was cut off from the land of the living;
for the transgression of my people He was punished.
He was assigned a grave with the wicked,
and with the rich in His death,
though He had done no violence,
nor was any deceit in His mouth.

Yet it was the LORD’s will to crush Him and cause Him to suffer,
and though the LORD makes His life an offering for sin,
He will see His offspring and prolong His days,
and the will of the LORD will prosper in His hand.
After He has suffered,
He will see the light of life and be satisfied;
by His knowledge my righteous servant will justify many,
and He will bear their iniquities.
Therefore I will give Him a portion among the great,
and He will divide the spoils with the strong,
because He poured out his life unto death,
and was numbered with the transgressors.
For He bore the sin of many,
and made intercession for the transgressors."

II Corinthians 12:7-10

2011-04-16T14:48:00.001-04:00

"...so I wouldn't get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then He told me, My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness. Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become."
~ II Corinthians 12:7-10 (The Message)

"...in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me,'My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. ~II Corinthians 12:7-10 (NIV)

Memory Verses March & April 2011:

2011-04-05T12:46:00.000-04:00

March 1, 2011
"The LORD your God is in your midst,
A victorious warrior
He will exult over you with joy,
He will be quiet in His love,
He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy."
~Zephaniah 3:17 (NASB)

March 15, 2011
"But we have this treasure in jars of clay
to show that this all-surpassing power is from God
and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side,
but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair;
persecuted, but not abandoned;
struck down, but not destroyed."
~II Corinthians 4:7-9 (NIV)

April 1, 2011
"Not to us, O LORD, not to us
But to Your name be the glory
Because of Your love and faithfulness."
~Psalm 115:1 (NIV)

April 15, 2011
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.
Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,
not looking to your own interests,
but each of you to the interests of the others."
~Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV)

Kids say and do the most profound things sometimes...

2011-03-29T22:54:00.002-04:00

I am the oldest girl in a family of eight children. I started babysitting when I was eleven. I've been nannying/teaching, or working with children since 2003. All of this to say, I've spent a significant amount of time with the youngest among us. I have a long list of some of the most hilarious things they have said to me over the years. I have alonger list of the profound things they have said to me and done in my presence. Today was no excpetion.....
As mentioned in a previous post, my dear friend Larua took on three young foster children a few months ago. They are siblings and were removed from their home as both parents are alcoholics and Daddy is a drug dealer. Abby is 4, Conner is 2, and Alex is 1. (The children's names have been changed for HIPPA/privacy purposes.) For the past few weeks, I have been giving Laura a hand with them, as she has her hands full with her 4 older children, 14, 12, 9, & 6. Every time I show up, I have a grand time with the kids. All three are understandably angry and that anger manifests itself in some ugly ways sometimes. Despite that, these three darlings have captured my heart, and taught me much.
I believe with all of my heart that on more than one occasion, God has used children to speak and confirm truth to my mind and heart. My youngest brother, Joel, is 14 now, and God has been using him since he could talk to teach me more about Himself. God used 2 year old Conner today....Conner's anger manifests itself in the ugliest way out of the three kids. He throws a nasty tantrum most times he is told no. Today he only threw 1 in the 6 hours I was with him. (A small miracle to be sure. :0) He told me today about an hour after I arrived that he really liked me. Each day when I arrive, he and his sister run excitedly for the door and yell "Mel is here!" Never fails to make my day! Today was special though. Conner would be playing and then several times throughout the day he would drop whatever he was playing with, run over to me and give me a hug and kiss on the cheek. He also climbed up in my lap several times and just cuddled with me all on his own....In all honesty, I am not all that different from Conner. I throw angry tantrums in my own way when God says no. Jesus loves me still. Oh that I would have the faith of a little child to trust implicitly that come what may, no matter how many times He says no, my heavenly Father ever, always has my very best interest at heart. He knows that in order to become all that He intends me to be, I must be told no....Oh that I would seek Him out to spend time with Him and express my love to Him several times throughout the day, simply because I long to be near Him and bask in His reassuring presence. God used a mini vessel to teach me that today. A rambunctious, brown-eyed toddler to be precise. God is good.

"Whatever It Takes..."

2011-03-10T16:52:00.002-05:00

I recently found a prayer journal I kept in the summer of 2007. Those brief summer months were a time of intense spiritual growth for me. God led me to Beth Moore's book, "Praying God's Word." He used it to grow me and root my mind and heart in His Word. Each morning, I rose early and went outside and spent time reading, journaling, and talking to my Savior. They were precious, precious times. A few weeks ago, I read through some of my entries in my prayer journal. Each prayer contained a similar theme....""Father today I ask that You would bring me to a better understanding of how powerful and awesome You are. Let me fall more in love with You today Lord Jesus, please have Your way in me." Another entry read "Whatever it takes Father, please accomplish Your will and Your way in my life. Thank You Jesus!" When I wrote "whatever it takes," I meant it with all my heart. I honestly had no idea what that would look like over the course of the next 3 1/2 years. That July, the symptoms of Bipolar disorder manifested themselves with intensity. I have realized since that time that my battle with insomnia, depression, and manic phases were the "whatever it takes" that God used to increase my understanding of and dependency upon Him. I have experienced some of the darkest days of my life over the past 3 1/2 years, and God has shown His lovingkindness, compassion, faithfulness, and mercy over and over and over again. He met me in my darkest hours. His mercies truly are new every morning, His compassions never ever fail, His grace is sufficient, and His power truly is perfected in our weakness. I would never have come to know how personally kind, loving, and faithful my Savior is had I not walked this road. God answered my prayer. He did and is continuing to do "whatever it takes" to accomplish His will and His way in my life, and I love Him all the more for it! Thank you Jesus for loving me as I am, but loving me too much to leave me that way!

The LORD is a Warrior....

2011-03-01T13:47:00.003-05:00

I love this verse and song...

"The LORD your God is in your midst,

A victorious warrior,

He will exult over you with joy,

He will be quiet in His love,

He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy."

~ Zephaniah 3:17 (NASB)

The Lord is a warrior

The Lord is mighty in battle

The Lord is a warrior

The Lord of hosts is He

My Lord is a fortress

He is a Sun and a Shield

The Lord is a Deliverer

To those who put their trust in Him

He gives strength unto His people

He guards His own with His Right Hand

The Angel of the Lord camps around the ones who fear Him

And delivers them

The Lord of hosts is He

~ Ark Angel

Godliness:

2011-02-22T07:53:00.001-05:00

"The practice of godliness is first of all the cultivation of a relationship with God, and from this the cultivation of a life that is pleasing to God. Our concept of God and our relationship with Him determine our conduct. Devotion to God consists of three essential elements: The fear of God, the love of God, and the desire for God."

"The reverent, godly Christian sees God first in His transcendent glory, majesty, and holiness, before He sees Him in His love, mercy, and grace."

"In our day we seem to have magnified the love of God almost to the exclusion of the fear of God. Because of this preoccupation, we are not honoring God and reverencing Him as we should.

"Only the God-fearing Christian can truly appreciate the love of God. He sees the infinite gulf between a holy God and a sinful creature, and the the love that bridged that gulf through the death of the Lord Jesus Christ."

~ Jerry Bridges ~ The Practice of Godliness

Prayer for Peace...

2011-02-18T05:34:00.005-05:00

Hear me, LORD, and have mercy on me. Help me, O LORD. You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to You and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give you thanks forever." ~ Psalm 30:10-12 (NLT)

"Lord it is night. The night is for stillness. Let us be still in the presence of God. It is night after a long day. What has been done has been done; what has not been done has not been done. Let it be. The night is dark. Let our fears of the darkness of the world and of our own lives rest in You. The night is quiet. Let the quietness of Your peace enfold us, all dear to us, and all who have no peace. The night heralds the dawn. Let us look expectantly to a new day, new joys, new possibilities. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen"

Memory Verses for February 2011:

2011-02-13T17:19:00.003-05:00

" Just as a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him. For He Himself knows our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust." ~Psalm 103:13-14 (NASB)

" ...So speak and so act as those who are to be judged by the law of liberty. For judgment will be merciless to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment."James 2:12-13 (NASB)

Psalm 103

2011-02-12T05:25:00.001-05:00
It's 4:30am and the Lord woke me up out of a dead sleep to spend time with Him in Psalm 103, my anchor passage. I absolutely love when He does this. I have been struggling and feeling rather dry spiritually, so this is timely. Tears streamed down my face just now as I read the Psalm aloud and let the deep and powerful truths of this passage flood my soul. God is so good!

"Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me bless His holy name. Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget none of His benefits; Who pardons all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases; Who redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion; Who satisfies your years with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle.

The LORD performs righteous deeds and judgments for all who are oppressed. He made known His ways to Moses, His acts to the sons of Israel. The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness. He will not always strive with us, nor will He keep His anger forever. He has not dealt with us according to our sins, nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him. As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. Just as a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him. For He Himself knows our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust.

As for man his days are like grass; As a flower of the field so he flourishes. When the wind has passed over it, it is no more, and it's place acknowledges it no longer. But the lovingkindness of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children's children, to those who keep His covenant and remember His precepts to do them.

The LORD has established His throne in the heavens, and His sovereignty rules over all. Bless the LORD, you His angels, mighty in strength, who perform His word, obeying the voice of His word! Bless the LORD all you His hosts, you who serve Him doing His will. Bless the LORD all you works of His, in all places of His dominion; Bless the LORD, O my soul!"

~Psalm 103 (NASB)

More than a conqueror....

2011-01-20T12:59:00.000-05:00
For three years I fought against the reality of my Bipolar Disorder diagnosis. I didn't want it. I wanted my "normal" life back. I wanted things to be the way they were before July of 2007. But that was not to be. Last Fall I began reading through and studying a book by Jerry Bridges called "Trusting God Even When Life Hurts." God used this book mightily in my life. I finally realized that I needed to stop kicking, screaming, and fighting against this diagnosis, and I did. I have now been praying and working toward getting on board with what God wants to do in and through me as I learn how to live with and manage Bipolar Disorder. I finally realized that all of my kicking and screaming against it wasn't making it go away, it was still there. I am learning how to manage it and asking God to help me see His hand at work through it. I want to walk this path well, and I know that God wants to teach me many glorious and wondrous things about Himself through this journey. I will trust Him in this because I know that He has His greatest glory and my best interest at heart. His ways are so much higher than mine, and I trust that He has a wonderful plan and purpose for this difficulty in my life.

"This I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassion's never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.'" Lamentations 3:21-24 (NIV)

"And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. For those God foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those He predestined, He also called; those He called, He also justified; those He justified, He also glorified.
What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all---how will He not also along with Him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died---more than that, who was raised to life---is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: 'For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.'
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all of creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." ~Romans 8:28-39 (NIV)

Memory Verses for January 2011:

2011-01-11T11:09:00.000-05:00
I am sure many of you have heard of Beth Moore. She is one of my favorite authors. God has used her writings and Bible Studies to impact and change my life on several occasions! I also follow her blog @ http://blog.lproof.org/ and have decided to participate in her Scripture memorization program for 2011. I thought I'd share the two verses I have selected for January.

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." ~Isaiah 43:18-19 (NIV)

"...Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for His compassion's never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.'" ~ Lamentations 3:21-24 (NIV)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBm5aSsp6o0

Help us LORD!

2011-01-07T12:04:00.000-05:00
Oh God, my brother is in such pain and the Doctors keep on treating his symptoms as they cannot seem to find the source of his difficulties. Father, help us in Jesus' Name! Thank You that You have saved Peter and therefore hold him in the very palm of Your hand. Father thank You that You are all powerful and all knowing and that this is not a surprise to You! Please let Pete somehow sense Your constant, comforting presence with Him even in the midst of his great pain! LORD please help those of us who love Pete to trust You with all of our hearts. Keep our eyes focused on You and grant us peace, comfort, wisdom, and rest. We love You Jesus, and it's in your matchless Name I pray, Amen!

"Merciful and faithful Lord, because of Your great love I am not consumed, for Your compassion's never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.' Lord, You are good to those whose hope is in You, to the one who seeks You." ~Prayer taken from Lamentations 3:22-25

Oh No He Never Lets Go!

2011-01-04T20:59:00.001-05:00
Last night I went with my parents to take my brother Peter to the Emergency room in Danville, PA. Pete has been extremely ill since Christmas night and this was our third trip to the ER with him in just a little over a week. If I had to be honest, I was scared as we drove. Sitting up makes Pete very sick, so he decided to lay with his head in my lap and asked me to rub his head to ease the pain. The sun was shining brightly, so I held a blanket over his eyes to keep it from hurting his head even more. Any of you who know Pete know how sick he would have to be in order to do these things. He never gets sick and has a higher pain tolerance than the rest of us kids combined. I started to sing quietly about Jesus and His many promises as we drove along....more for my own comfort than for Pete's. I was trying hard not to cry, but a tear slipped down my cheek in spite of my efforts. I couldn't help but flashback to when Pete was just a newborn and we were making another trip to the ER, but that time was for my mom. I sat with him in the backseat and held his binky in his mouth while Mary Truitt drove us to the hospital in Tunkhannock. I was eleven and Pete was a week old. I was just as scared then. It hurts more than I can express to see the ones you love in so much pain. As we drove along yesterday and the words of the hymns I was singing sank into my soul...Jesus began to remind me how faithful He has been to our family over the years. As scary as that time and this time have been, He has never forgotten or forsaken us. I cried out to Him on Pete's behalf, and He comforted my soul.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, God is bigger and stronger than any circumstance we may face in this life and He never let's us go.

"'My sheep listen to My voice; I know them, and they follow Me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of My hand. My Father who has given them to Me is greater than all, no one can snatch them out of My Father's hand. I and the Father are one.'" ~John 10:27-29

Hopelessness vs. Unbreakable Hope...

2011-01-01T13:35:00.000-05:00
Sleep is eluding me tonight, so I am reading....I came accross this quote by Beth Moore, and it really spoke to me. I doubt that many of you who read this struggle with feeling hopeless. As someone who battles bouts of depression from time to time, I do struggle that way. Perhaps once you read the quote, what I am saying will make more sense....

"Hopelessness is never of God. Never. Nothing is too difficult for Him. Nothing is beyond His reach. His restoration. Even His reconciliation...May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." ~ Beth Moore

Amen!

My Hiding Place...

2010-12-06T16:21:00.001-05:00
I cried tears of gratitude when I read this passage of Scripture today and listened to a song that was written directly from it...

"How blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered! How blessed is the man to whom the LORD does not impute iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit!

When I kept silent about my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; My vitality was drained away as with the fever heat of summer. I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I did not hide; I said, 'I will confess my transgressions to the LORD;' And you forgave the guilt of my sin. Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to You in a time when You may be found; Surely in a flood of great waters they shall not reach him. You are my hiding place; You preserve me from trouble; You surround me with songs of deliverance.

I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with My eye upon you. Do not be as the horse or as the mule which have no understanding, whose trappings include bit and bridle to hold them in check, otherwise they will not come near to you. Many are the sorrows of the wicked, but he who trusts in the LORD, lovingkindness shall surround him. Be glad in the LORD and rejoice, you righteous ones; And shout for joy, all you who are upright in heart."

Psalm 32

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EF5ieYJCqnw

Cathartic Honesty....

2010-11-27T05:29:00.001-05:00
I have never really considered myself a writer, just someone who has figured out how to get by in that particular department. I honestly believe that God has wanted me to write this note for a while. I don't think I have been avoiding it, just waiting for the proverbial "perfect" words and timing, as if there is such a thing. There has definitely been a lot of fear involved in the process as well. Let's be honest here, it's hard to be real. It makes us vulnerable, and we feel open to attack when we're honest. Bottom line, honesty and realness are hard and sometimes even painful. They are also healing and cathartic. I have written some pretty honest posts on facebook before, then one day when I was feeling particularly vulnerable, I deleted them. All of them. Truth be told, my sharing openly and honestly in a blog isn't really about me, although I do reap some wonderfully cathartic benefits. Over the course of the past three and a half years, God has and still is helping me understand that my reputation rests securely in His hands. What can man do to me? He has also helped me realize that silence is oft a tool wielded destructively by the devil himself. To keep silent about my journey over the past few years is to risk leaving someone else who has perhaps struggled as I have still feeling isolated and alone. Perhaps still believing satan's age old lie that they are the only one who struggles this way and they better keep quiet about it, lest someone think ill of them. I can be silent no longer.

In July of 2007, I started experiencing severe insomnia. About a month later, I moved to Martinsburg, West Virginia to teach 1st grade at a wonderful Christian school there. I had a lovely little apartment, I knew a few people from that area that I had gone to college with and had even found a great church. I was a 24 year old Bible college graduate who finally felt like all her "ducks were in a row." Long story short, the insomnia intensified to the point that I really started to feel like I was "losing it." After a week without sleeping, I had an emotional breakdown that landed me in the hospital. I'll let you fill in the gaps here. A week later, I moved back home with my parents to recover. At the time I honestly thought I had just had a bad couple of months and figured that I'd be able to "get back on my feet" within 6 months. In some ways, I did. A distinct cycle began to manifest itself however, and it was concerning to me as well as my family. Each month, I would experience a week of severe depression, followed by a week of extremely high energy and insomnia. Then I would be "normal" for the other two weeks of the month. I saw a Psychiatrist regularly and it didn't take him long to diagnose me with bipolar disorder. He started me on an anti-depressant which did nothing for my symptoms, but provided me with a plethora of unpleasant side-effects. During this time I was working with Autistic Children. Work I loved, but was highly stressful. Eventually, the cycle got so intense, that I had to give up my job. My Psychiatrist switched me over to another antidepressant combined with another new medication called Abilify that was supposedly good people with Bipolar disorder. It didn't help me and once again I was provided with a lovely dose of side-effects. Finally, I decided to go to my regular doctor for a full physical, blood work, etc. to get a second opinion. He looked me straight in the eye and said that I didn't have bipolar disorder. He then informed me that my difficulties were purely hormonal and could be easily rectified with birth control pills. While it did help a little bit, I still experienced the erratic monthly cycle of depression, mania, then normalcy. I had to give up working once again. Finally I scheduled an appointment with a Psychologist (counselor.) in the area. After 9 weeks, he said he really did think I was suffering from bipolar disorder, and referred me to a Psychiatrist who could actually make the diagnosis and begin treatment. A little over a month ago I made my first visit to Dr. Denilo deSoto's office. After meeting with him, he decided to put me on a mood stabilizer. Since that time I have not experienced a bout of depression or mania. As my husband so aptly put it, we are cautiously optimistic at this point. I haven't felt this "normal" in over three years. To be quite honest, I am not exactly sure what to do with the "new normal."

Having said all that, I would be remiss if I did not mention two key components in my journey toward wholeness. My heavenly Father has literally not only been with me, but held me every step of the way. John 10:27 & 28. Even in my darkest hour lying in an emergency room hospital bed, when I cried out to Him, He met me in a very real way. His mercy and faithfulness have become tangibly real to me over the past three and a half years. When He said He would never leave us or forsake us as His children, He wasn't messing around! I can honestly say that I am thankful for the past few years because I would not know how very kind and personal our God really is had I not walked this path. We do indeed serve an all-powerful, all-knowing, all-wise God! I long for heaven and home where I can be in His presence and worship Him forever and always!

The last thing I wanted to mention, was that through reading and doing a little research, I have realized some things that I can do naturally that really help me manage my bipolar disorder on a daily basis. First of all being sunshine and exercise. My husband is really good about helping me stay on top of those two things. I have gotten a lot better at it recently too. I make it my goal to get outside and take a long, brisk walk every day. Even if the sun isn't shining and it's really cold, I do my utmost to get out there. Exercise and vitamin D are vitally important to every human being, but especially important to anyone who struggles with depression of any kind. The other three things I have found to be helpful, are making sure I am eating enough dark green, high-iron vegetables every day, maintaining a similar routine from day to day (definitely the hardest thing for me right now.) and drinking the same amount of caffeine from day to day. I know that last one may sound weird, but messing with your caffeine intake, can really mess you up, especially if you have a propensity for depression. I drink one to two cups of coffee every day, and it really helps me if I remain consistent with that. I also try to make sure I drink plenty of water as that helps me as well. Oh I also forgot to mention that I take vitamins every day that also keep me evened out.

Having shared all of this, my hope and my prayer is that this note has somehow in some way been an encouragement and blessing to you. God in His infinite mercy has been more than kind to me and I am forever grateful!

Psalm 103

"Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy name.
Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget none of His benefits; Who pardons all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases; Who redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion; Who satisfies you years with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle. The LORD performs righteous deeds and judgments for all who are oppressed.He made known His ways to Moses, His acts to the sons of Israel. The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness. He will not always strive with us, nor will He keep His anger forever. He has not dealt with us according to our sins, nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him. As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. Just as a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him.For He Himself knows ]our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust. As for man, his days are like grass; As a flower of the field, so he flourishes. When the wind has passed over it, it is no more, and its place acknowledges it no longer. But the lovingkindness of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children's children, to those who keep His covenant and remember His precepts to do them. The LORD has established His throne in the heavens, and His sovereignty rules over all. Bless the LORD, you His angels, mighty in strength, who perform His word, obeying the voice of His word! Bless the LORD, all you His hosts, you who serve Him, doing His will.Bless the LORD, all you works of His, in all places of His dominion; Bless the LORD, O my soul!"

Sarcasm

2010-11-03T11:23:00.000-04:00
I have never handled sarcasm well. The old addage "If you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen." holds true for me. I am the one running for the door. Sarcasm confuses and often times hurts to be honest. I have heard some say that they think it is a spiritual gift, albeit sarcastically. With all due respect, in my limited experience and understanding, I would have to disagree. Sarcasm when expressed at my expense, cuts deeply. I have been told by many to lighten up and just let the words roll off of me like water off a ducks back. I have tried...but to no avail. When I was in college I heard it said that "Sarcasm is destruction dressed up in clowns clothes." At the risk of sounding dramatic, I would have to agree. I am a pretty literal person, not unlike a small child. I would rather err on the side of caution and hold my tongue, then to enter the ring and risk hurting someone with a careless word.

Father forgive me for every careless and hurtful word I have ever spoken. Teach me I pray to speak only that which is kind, edifying, and necessary. Lord, help me to watch my mouth!

Ephesians 5:1-5

Be Imitators of God

1 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children;

2 and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.

3 But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints;

4 and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.

5 For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.

"...But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give and accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned." ~ Matthew 12:36 & 37

Bucket List

2010-10-21T11:00:00.001-04:00
Bucket List:

1. Fly on an airplane

2. Have coffee and a nice long chat with Beth Moore

3. Sing “Long Live the King” onstage with Aaron Shust

4. Go to Prince Edward Island in Canada

5. Visit the O’Hara Family in Fresno, California

6. Teach Pre-K

7. Go to the Beach with Justin

8. Become a Mother

9. Adopt and Orphan

10. Get better at playing the Piano and learn to play the Guitar and Cello

11. Sing and share about God

12. Learn to manage the disorder I have well

13. Visit Kristi in Germany for 2 weeks

14. Go on a Cruise

15. Learn to Dance

16. Learn to drive a motorcycle

17. Learn to Knit

18. Teach Music and Dance to children free of charge

19. Learn to Sew

20. Become an Auto Mechanic

21. See “The Phantom of the Opera” from the front row on Broadway

22. Live and serve in another country for a year

23. Swim with a Dolphin

24. Become more disciplined every day. “Discipline is the price of freedom.”

25. Love and serve Jesus Christ and others with everything I’ve got more and more every day!

Oh My Gracious Heavens!

2010-10-05T14:51:00.001-04:00
So, our dear friends, Dave & Debby Longacre asked us to take care of their dog Shamus while they are away on vacation this week. They live just down the road from us. All we have to do is walk or drive down to their house and feed and water Shamus every morning. Easy right? HA! I got there later than I planned today, (the morning got away from me a bit.) I finally made it down there at about 9:30am. I am planning to grocery shop today, so I got myself all ready for the day and headed down to take care of good ol' Shamus. In and out, that was the plan. I got him his food first which he immediately started devouring. I then took his water dish into the house to fill in the kitchen sink. After filling it, I noticed that there was a small, yet steady stream of water still flowing from the spigot. I was pretty sure I had turnd the water all the way off. Hmmmm? I decided to take Shamus his water, then come back to try and fix the problem. Boy was I in for a surprise! I checked both the hot and cold water handles and pushed them all the way back to the off position. Still the water flowed. I turned them on and then off again...water still flowing. I realized that the hot water handle was the culprit, so I began fiddling with it to try and make the water stop. BAM! The handle flew off and hot water started spewing EVERYWHERE. Panicking, I tried to get the handle back on to contain the explosion, but to no avail. I tried for the next 5 minutes to stop the water, but my efforts were in vain. I had left my cell phone in the car, so I ran out and quickly dialed my husband's number. He is at school today, so I knew there was a good chance I woudn't catch him in between classes. No answer. Grrrrr! I really did not want to bother Dave and Debby on their vacation, especially not with the news that I was currently flooding their kitchen! Swallowing my pride, I dialed Dave's number. "Hi Dave, it's Melody, how are you? Ummmm, where's the water shut-off for your kitchen sink?" "Under the sink." Dave replied. "DUH MEL!" I thought to myself. EVERYONE knows that. For crying out loud, even I know that, but in my state of panic, I forgot. Thankfully, Dave was very understanding, and I assured him I would clean up the mess. Now, whether or not they will ever ask me to take care of their dog again remains to be seen. :0P I got the water turned off, mopped up the floor, and returned home soaking wet. Now I cannot stop laughing about it! LOL.

What's The Matter With You?

2010-09-14T10:36:00.001-04:00
Trials come in our lives and trials go,

Some stay forever, ya know.

You wake each morn with a new day before you,

Yes, full of promise but full of trouble too.

But what's the matter with you?

Is your God dead?Has He forsaken you?

His promise unkept?

Where has He gone in your time of need

and utter helplessness?

Is His Word only true when times are good?

Does His love for you depend on who you are?

or what you've done for Him?

You never know what a day may bring forth

Most times it's better that you don't;

We should learn to take each day just as it comes,

For as our days go, so shall our strength become.

~Sandi Francis 1982

My Mom had just found out she was pregnant w/ me when she wrote this. My two older brothers who are twins were just 1 year old, and had had a rough first year health wise. The Doctor also told her at her/my first ultra sound that there were at least two babies in her womb, possibly 3. (This was based soley on heartbeat, technology has come a LOOOOONG way since 1982 folks! :0) She was feeling slightly overwhelmed with so much going on. I don't know about you, but I can relate to this song on more than one level. :0)

"When my heart is faint within me, when my eyes can't see the way,

when hope seems to elude me and the night becomes my day.

I am overcome with anguish much too heavy to relieve;

He's the only One who stands there close enough for me to reach.

I am tired and I am weary of this journey that I'm on;

It's confusing and it's painful and it's taking much too long.

If I could see through to the ending, if I knew all that would be;

Would I find that I am happier? Would it matter much to me?

Life is never as you plan it, there are turns and curves thrown in;

but the bottom line is KNOWING I am better off WITH Him!"

~ Midnight Musings, Sandi Francis, (aka, my Mom) 1998

I REFUSE......

2010-02-12T11:26:00.000-05:00
I have been reading in Philippians 1, and reading and studying the life of Paul in another book by Beth Moore. It is as though I am hearing Paul's story and reading his inspired writings for the very first time. Paul experienced imprisonment and suffering FAR GREATER than the minor difficulties I have experienced in my lifetime. His suffering came as a result of His sharing the saving message of Jesus publicly and without apology. In Philippians 1:12-15,18b-21, 29-30 30, Paul says this....
"Now I want you to know my brothers, that my circumstances have turned out for the greater progress of the gospel, so that my imprisonment in the cause of Christ has become well known throughout the whole praetorian guard (elite guards in Rome, 9,000+ public law enforcers) and to everyone else, and that most of the brethren, trusting in the Lord because of my imprisonment, have far more courage to speak the word of God without fear. ....I (Paul) will rejoice, for I know that this will turn out for my deliverance through your prayers and the provision of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, according to my earnest expectation and hope, that I will not be put to shame in anything, but that with all boldness, Christ will even now, as always, be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me to live is Christ, to die is gain.....for to you it has been granted for Christ's sake, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake, experiencing the same conflict which you saw in me, and now hear to be in me."

I cried my way through both sermons at church on Sunday. Tears of joy flowed freely, as God affirmed in my heart the reality that the suffering of depression I have battled is truly a blessing in disguise. I believe with all my heart, that as I look to Christ day by day, taking one moment at a time, He will lift me up. As I walk this road He has set out for me and choose day by day not to panic, or become overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and shame, He will use this for His greater good, and glorification in and through my life! I refuse this day to be defined by this struggle. I choose this moment to believe and place all my hope in the promise that not only do I BELONG to God the Father, but when He looks at me, he does not see what I used to be, but He sees Jesus living inside of me. He sees all that I am becoming and will be in Christ before my life on this earth is over. So long, satan and all your rotten lies I have been believing. I am SO done letting you bog me down with this and rob me of my joy. God is my victory and in Him and Him alone I rest secure!
My parents gave me the name Melody Joy. When I was about 12, my mom explained that my name means "Song of Joy." Their prayer for me from the moment they knew I was coming, was that I would be a song of joy in people's lives, pointing them to God. Father, let it ever be so! My new last name is King.....so NOW, my name means, "Song of Joy to the King" I like to add a little extra and hope and pray with all my heart, that as I learn to take every thought captive in Christ, and refuse to believe any of the world's and ultimately satan's stupid lies about me, my daily life will be an exuberant "SONG OF JOY TO THE KING OF KINGS!

"This is my prayer in the battle, when triumph is still on it's way. I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ, so firm on His promise I'll stand. I will bring praise, I will bring praise. No weapon formed against me shall remain. I WILL REJOICE, I WILL DECLARE, GOD IS MY VICTORY AND HE IS HERE!!!!" Amen?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WYK6TxWX7s

2009-06-07T08:11:00.000-04:00
I AM GETTING MARRIED TO THE LOVE OF MY LIFE IN 63 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!! :0) :0) :0)

Top 25 Favorite Songs!

2009-02-26T07:03:00.000-05:00
THE RULES: Once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write down the top 25 recordings you would want with you always. The ones you can listen to over and over and never get tired of. They don't have to be in any particular order. These are the songs that make laugh, cry, think of an old friend, whatever the reason . At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If you were tagged, it's because I want to know more about you. To do this, go to "notes" under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 songs, tag some friends, then click publish.

I could really list 100's of songs, but these are some of my favorites!

1) Desert Song- Hillsong
2) You Invite Me In- Meredith Andrews
3) Fight Another Day- Brandon Heath
4) Long Live the King- Aaron Shust
5) Free to Be Me- Francesca Batistelli
7) I Will Rise- Chris Tomlin
8) Draw Me Nearer- Meredith Andrews
9) Give Me Your Eyes- Brandon Heath
10) Why? Nichole Nordeman
11) Held- Natalie Grant
12) Cry Out to Jesus- Third Day
13) When Did you Fall in Love With Me? Chris Rice
14) Love Them Like Jesus- Casting Crowns
15) Mercy Came Running- Phillips Craig and Dean
16) Inside Out- Hillsong
17) Mighty To Save- Michael W. Smith
18) Beautiful- Phil Wickham
19) My Saviour My God- Aaron Shust
20 )You're Not Alone- Meredith Andrews
21) Two Princes- Spin Doctors
22) Don't Get Comfortable- Brandon Heath
23) How Can I Keep From Singing Your Praise- Chris Tomlin
24) Nothing But Th Blood- The Swift
25) Song of Love- Rebecca St. James

This was really fun for me to do. I really had to think long and hard about how to narrow this down. Hope you have as much fun as I did.

Desert Song

2009-02-20T12:19:00.001-05:00
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WYK6TxWX7s

This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides

And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain

I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be empited again
The seed I've recieved I will sow

Getting Out of a Pit

2009-02-19T12:15:00.001-05:00
So I am reading another book by Beth Moore called "Looking Up When Life is Looking Down" (hence the title of my last note) and it's all about dealing with hurt and disappointment in life and about the powerful message of hope and deliverance found in Psalm 40. She boldly declares God's promise to hear your cries, to establish your feet on solid ground, and to graciously, faithfully, and lovingly provide all that you need in every circumstance of your life.
"He has put a new song in my mouth------praise to our God; Many will see and fear, and will trust in the Lord." Psalm 40:3

I was really struck by todays reading as it is the prayer of my heart...........
"When I was a little girl, God already knew the plans He had for me...just as He knew the plans He had for you. in His sovereignty, He allowed a series of wrongs to come to me that had mammoth effects on my life. For many years I reaped a whirlwind of negative consequences and added insult to injury by piling all manner of sin onto my victimization...Then one day, at the bottom of my pit, I raised my weary head, and dirty, tear streaked face to the sky. And redemption drew nigh. God knew the plans He had for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me. Plans to give me a hope and a future.......I have lived long enough to see beauty exceed the ashes and divine pleasure exceed the pain.
"Dear one, whether or not I say a word aout my past, God uses it every single day without fail. In my ministry. In friendship. In motherhood. In marriage.
Oh beloved, you keep thinking how things might have been had THAT thing not happened. But it is your wealth of experience that makes you rich. (this is the part that I love!) Spend it on hurting people. They need it so badly. If God can use child abuse and family tragedy, He can use anything. You don't have to be in full time ministry for Him to accomplish the kind of redemption I described above. People in your workplace and your neighborhood are dying for hope. Dying to know there's a future Dying to know there's a God......and that He's FOR the not against them.
Should you be willing to leave a legacy of faith, some of those lives you help will grace this earth after you're gone. Lives needing the kind of help you can give are surrounding you right now. Each one of them is worth the work.

"Now thanks be to God who always leads us to triumph in Christ, and through us dffuses the fragrance of His knowledge in every place." 2 Corinthians 2:14

Looking Up When Life is Looking Down......

2009-02-18T09:00:00.000-05:00
"Why so cast down, O my soul? And why so burdened within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God." ~Psalm 42:11

"Life can be excruciating. Crushing, in fact. The sheer magnitude of our worries can press down on our heads and, one inch at a time, we unknowingly descend into a pit of despair. Something so horrible can happen that we conclude we'll never be ok again. We can blow it so badly we think God would just as soon we stayed under that dirt and out of His sight. BUT if we are willing to let truth speak louder than our feelings and long enough that our feelings finally agree, we can be far more than ok. We can be delivered to a place where the air is crisp, the enemy is whipped, and the view is magnificent.
The Bible teaches that there are no lost causes; no permanent pit-dwellers except those who refuse to leave. Every person can know complete redemption in Jesus Christ, purpose for life, and fullness of joy." Beth Moore

"I waited patiently for he Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the LORD." ~ Psalm 40:1-3

WOW!

2009-01-19T08:49:00.000-05:00
This is going to be a LONG one, so hang on tight! I promise though if you hang on til the end, you will be blessed and encouraged, I know I was!

"I was a mess before the Savior set me free. That's why my dearest life passages are found in Isaiah 61:1-2 and quoted again in the Gospel of Luke. Jesus went to His home synagogue in Nazareth and declared both the fact and the Nature of His call and ministry------to preach good news to the poor......to heal the brokenhearted........to proclaim freedom for the prisoner........sight for the blind.......to release the oppressed.......and to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor (Luke 4:18-19). Let's briefly discuss each part of that description:
1.) 'The Spirit of the Lord is on Me, because He has annointed Me to preach good news to the poor' (Luke 4:18). Christ didn't mean the finacially destitue. The Greek word for "poor" is ptochos, indicating 'utter helplessness, complete destitution, afflicted, distressed.' I think God is far too faithful to let anyone make it through life without confronting seasons of utter helplessness. Sooner or later, any healthy individual discovers that autonomy doesn't cut it. Like beggars we go from person to person with our empty cup, crying, "Can't you add anything to my life?' They might throw in a coin or two. But when we shake the cup, the tinny echo reminds us how empty we remain. Until we allow Jesus to fill our cups daily, we simply subsist. Sooner or later, God will make sure we confront the poverty of living on the alms of others so that we may learn to feast on Him.
2.) 'To heal the brokenhearted' (Luke 4:18). Some New Testament translations include this phrase, while others don't. Either way, it is worthy of our consideration. The original word for 'brokenhearted' is suntribo, meaning 'to break, strike against something.......to break the stength or power of someone.' The Greek word for 'heal' is iaomai, meaning 'to heal, cure, restore.' I love the Hebrew word translated 'heal' in Exodus 15:26 when God introduced Himself by a new title: 'I am the LORD who heals you.' the word raphah means 'to mend (by stitching), repair thoroughly, make whole.' I picture God focusing steadily on the object of repair. One stitch follows another. It takes time. I picture painful penetrations of the healing needle. I don't know about you, but I am quite sure if my healing process had been painless, I would have relapsed.
3.) 'To proclaim freedom for the prisoners' (v.18). Long after my salvation, I was in many ways like the prisoners in Psalm 107:10-16,20, suffering 'in iron chains, for they had rebelled against he words of God' (vv.10-11). Many people sincerely love God, but I don't think anyone stands to understand the unfailing love of God like the believer finally set free from failure. I know this captive can undoubtedly testify: He sent forth His Word and healed me. Stitch by stitch. But please notice that Christ proclaimed freedom, He didn't impose it. It remains an offer.
4.) 'Recovery of sight for the blind' (v.18). Although Christ would heal many from physical blindness, I believe His intent here was a far more serious kind of blindness. Second Corinthians 4:4 says. 'The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.' I find the original word for blind in both Luke's Gospel and Paul's second letter to the Corinthians to be so interesting. Tuphlos means 'to envelope with smoke, to be unable to see clearly.' Perhaps none of the enemy's attempts to cloud our vision compare to our fiery trials. His job is to keep us blinded to the One who walks with us through the fire. Oh, believer, God is there whether our spiritual eyes discern Him or not.
5.) 'To release the oppressed' (v.18). I looked up every definition for 'oppressed' in the Greek and Hebrew dictionaries. A half dozen original words are translated in the Bible with our single word 'oppressed,' and all but one have the word 'break' in the definition. I'm becoming more and more convinced that heavy-duty oppression is Satan's counterfeit for biblical brokenness. At times I have fought back tears as I've heard testimonies of people who had been utterly unable to function, describing themselves as broken by God. I don't think God's brand of brokenness is total emotional wreckage. God's intent in breaking us is to bend our stiff knees so that we will submit to His authority and take on His yoke. His aim is our abundant and effective life. Being totally unable to function because the mind and emotions are in shambles is Satan's counterfeit. Praise God, Christ can certainly use Satan's counterfeit brokenness to bring us to a place of accepting His own, but I think we credit some things to Christ that He doesn't do.
6.) 'To proclaim the year of the Lord's favor' (v. 19). Those who gathered that year in the Nazarene synagogue were staring in the face of the Lord's favor------His blessed gift of grace, Jesus Christ. The word "year" can be translated as 'any definite time.' God places before each of us a definitive period of time to accept the Lord's favor. He wills for none to perish but for all to come to repentance (see 2 Peter 3:9). The world has until His return. The individual has a definitive period of time known by God alone. I am not past begging people not to wait too long for salvation, because eternal life in heaven is at stake. Neither am I beyond begging them to embrace His freedom, because abundant life on earth is at stake. How he longs to be Your champion now."
~Beth Moore

Temptation and the Word

2009-01-17T05:32:00.001-05:00
I was really blessed and encouraged by my Bible study this morning which was about the temptation of Christ and some brief and practical applications we can draw from it.....

"- Seasons of intense temptation are not indications of God's displeasure

-Satan is tenacious. Don't expect him to give up after one or two tries.

-Scripture is the most powerful tool in our fight against temptation. Don't fight back with your words. Fight back with God's!"
~Beth Moore

One of my greatest temptations is to think things that aren't true about God and things that aren't true about myself, such as that God is angry at me and doesn't want to hear from me because I struggle and fail sometimes. I have to CONSTANTLY remind myself through the Word who God is and who I am in Christ. I love the gospel and love to think on it over and over again, and this is what keeps me steady in Christ!

Rest

2009-01-15T07:48:00.001-05:00
Resting in You Lord Jesus,
Safe from the storms at sea,
Tucked in Your arms and sheltered,
Here You wil steady me.
~Sheila Walsh

"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, 'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in Him will I trust'"
~Psalm 91:1-2

The River

2009-01-14T06:23:00.001-05:00
I know I include alot of lyrics in my notes and I don't really know how many people take the time to stop and read them.....they are all songs that God has used mightily in my life to bless, encourage, and even chastise me at times. I write them out here so that you may share in the blessing that I have received from God. This song is another one by my favorite Christian female artist, Meredith Andrews who happens to be just two weeks older than I am. (Fun Fact! :0) I had the privilege of being introduced to Meredith and her music last April at an Aaron Shust (another favorite) concert where she was the opening artist. The beautiful truths in her music brought me to tears, and I have been blessed over and over again by her CD called the Invitation. If you get the chance you should check her out, I promise you WILL be blessed.

everyone is broken and in need of a savior
so He came and was broken for the mocker,
for the shamed
still our eyes are blinded by the culture,
by the lies
we can't see that were filthy, we're fallen
and so dry

but He invites us
can you hear Him say
He invites us
hear Him call your name

welcome to the river
come drink come wade come find your very life
welcome to the river of God
where your brokeness is washed away

everywhere is the sorrow
and the pain of empty living
you can see it, look in their eyes
all the hopelessness of the world
but look closer He is right there
in the midst of every fear

living water is the offer
restoration is the call
and He invites us
can you hear Him say
He invites us
hear Him call your name

welcome to the river
come drink come wade come find your very life
welcome to the river of god
where your brokeness is washed away

welcome to the river
come drink come wade come find your very life
welcome to the river of God
where your brokeness is washed away

find your healing
find your freedom
in the river of God

find your healing
find your freedom
in the river of God

your healing here
your freedom here
in the river of God

your healing here
your freedom here
in the river of God

welcome to the river
come drink come wade come find your very life
welcome to the river of God
where your brokeness is washed away

..washed away

everyone is broken and in need of a savior

~Meredith Andrews

Awestruck

2009-01-10T06:34:00.000-05:00
I am in awe of the kindness and mercy of our God and of the way He whispers truth to our hearts in the dark times!

Listening

2008-12-04T08:53:00.000-05:00
"Now his parents went to Jerusalem every year at the feast of the passover. And when He became twelve, they went up there according to the custom of the Feast; and as they were returning, after spending the full number of days, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, But His parents were unaware of it, but supposed Him to be in the caravan, and went a day's journey; and they began looking for Him among their relatives and acquaintances. When they did not find Him, they returned to Jerusalem lookin for Him. Then, after three days they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both listening to them and asking them questions. And all who heard Him were amazed at His understandig and His answers." Luke 2:41-47

"Listening." I'm so thankful that Christ not only speaks, He also listens. We don't know if God allowed the twelve-year-old Christ to exercise His full omniscience or to unleash just enough wisdom to astound His listeners. But I love the fact that Christ still listens-----not just to learn, since He knows all things. Rather, He allows us to pour out our hearts because He loves us and wants to hear us." ~ Beth Moore

"O Lord Jesus, just as during Your early life You offered prayers and appeals to the Father with loud cries and tears-----and were heard because of Your reverance and submission (Heb. 5:7)-----I pray that I too would come before You in perfect trust, knowing that You always live to intercede for us." (Heb. 7:25)

Midnight Musings

2008-12-03T02:43:00.001-05:00
Welp here it is 2:30AM and I am wide awake. I do not know what the purpose of all this insomnia is, but I am trying to make the most of it........I know that most of you have probably never heard of Meredith Andrews' music, but I had the privilege of discoverig it at an Aaron Shust concert I went to where she along with Brandon Heath opened the show. To say that her music has blessed me would be an understatement. As I sit here typing this I am listening to my favorite song of hers "Draw Me Nearer" that I posted the lyrics for on here a while back. Anyway, God has gifted this woman greatly and her music is poweful and a great blessing. If you ever get the chance to check it out, you should, her album is called "The Invitation" and is available online or at most Chrstian bookstores. A song of hers that has blessed me tonight is called "The New Song We Sing" and is surprise, surprise about redemption, my favorite subject! I thought I would share it with you.......

"You are the God who reconciles the wayward heart through Christ. The old has gone, the new has come, we are reconciled by love, We are reconciled by love

And this is the new song we sing To the king of heaven This is the new song we bring After all you’ve given We stand before you redeemed As your children This is the new song we sing

We who were once so far away are brought near by Your blood The barrier has been destroyed By Your grace we freely come, by Your grace we freely come

We live in You, we live for you We live to you our king We stand in You, we stand for You We stand as your redeemed ‘Your redeemed!’

REDEMPTION

2008-12-02T10:03:00.000-05:00
My devotional from Beth Moore's book "JESUS, 90 Days With the One and Only" was on redemption, my favorite topic, so I thought I would share some of the Scriptures and thoughts with you..........

"The Word made flesh first entered the temple wrapped in a baby blanket. His earthly parents lifted Him to His Father and, in essence, purchased Him from heaven------for a while-------for a lost world. One day that baby would buy them from earth for the glory of heaven. Wow!"

"For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though He was rich, yet for your sake He became poor, so that you through His poverty might become rich." Second Corinthians 8:9

"For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all men, instructing us to deny ungodliness and wordly desires, and to live sensibly, righteously, and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Christ Jesus, who gave Himself for us to REDEEM us from every lawless deed, and to purify for Himself a people for His own possession, zealous for good deeds." Titus 2:11-14

"The precepts of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes. The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever; the judgements of the LORD are true; they are righteous altogether." Psalm 19:8-9

What a hope we have in Jesus!

2008-12-01T08:01:00.001-05:00
There's a peace I've come to know
Though my heart and flesh may fail
There's an anchor for my soul
I can say "It is well"

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

There's a day that's drawing near
When this darkness breaks to light
And the shadows disappear
And my faith shall be my eyes

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

And I hear the voice of many angels sing,
"Worthy is the Lamb"
And I hear the cry of every longing heart,
"Worthy is the Lamb"
And I hear the voice of many angels sing,
"Worthy is the Lamb"
And I hear the cry of every longing heart,
"Worthy is the Lamb"

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

~ Chris Tomlin

Thankful

2008-11-27T15:20:00.000-05:00
I am thankful for so many different things this Thanksgiving.....but I honestly think that what I am thankful for the most is the hope and assurance of eternity in heaven with Jesus.....what a promise, what a gift!

GLORIOUS DAY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcEnb4VNggw

"One day when heaven
Is filled with His praises
One day when sin was as black as could be
Jesus came forth to
Be born of a virgin
Dwelt among man, my example is He

[Chorus:]

Living He loved me
Dying He saved me
Buried He carried my sin far away
Rising He justifies
Freely forever
One day He's coming
Oh, Glorious Day
Oh, Glorious Day

One day they led Him
Up calvaries mountain
One day they nailed Him
To die on a tree
Suffering anguish
Despised and rejected
Carrying my sins, my redeemer is He

[Chorus]

One day the grave could seal Him no longer
One day the sorrow waved from the door
Then He arose
Oh death He had conquered
Now my sin is ended
My Lord forever more

[Chorus]

One day the trumpet will
Sound for His coming
One day the sky with His
Glories will shine"

Wonderful day
My beloved will bring
Glorious Savior,Jesus is mine"

Unbelievably Blessed

2008-10-27T12:22:00.001-04:00
Do you ever feel overwwhelmed by all the ways God has blessed you? I am in awe of the way that God holds onto me and never lets go, even when the dark times come. I am also amazed at the awesome people He has brought into my life that have more than blessed it. Lastly I am AMAZED at how He provides for my needs, not just physically, but emotionally, and spritually as well. We serve and endlessy kind and gracious King, and I am overjoyed and overwhelmed wih gratitude to be a part of His family!

Sleep Anyone?

2008-10-02T01:46:00.000-04:00
Here I sit sipping my hot chocolate, wondering if sleep is going to come tonight.....

A Persevering Worshipper

2008-07-11T08:13:00.000-04:00
"The heart of God loves a persevering worshipper, who though overwhelmed by many things in life, is overwhelmed more by the beauty of God."

"Joyful worship is not based on your circumstances; It is based on the overwhelming joy of knowing God, being loved and forgiven by Him and having the privilege of serving Him in return."

Poem

2008-07-09T04:25:00.000-04:00
A dear woman at my old church wrote this poem and gave it to me a few weeks back and it has been an unbelievable encouragement and blessing to me. I pray it is the same for you! :-)

" My Saviour, My Friend
Come sit with Me, He says, and talk
I have great stories to tell;
Or walk with me, I'll show you
Awesome things I've made
Or laugh with me as we rest
In the garden's shade
Or cry: And I'll catch your broken heart
And hold the pieces as it falls apart
Then I'll be the succor for your pain
'til you're revived, then we
Will walk and talk again."

** The word succor means: timely aide in distress

Faith

2008-07-08T09:45:00.000-04:00
".....That is why faith is such a necessary virtue: Unless you teach your moods 'where they get off', you can never be either a sound Christian, or even a sound atheist, but just a creature dithering to and fro, with it's beliefs really dependant on the weather and the state of it's digestion. Consequently, one must train the habit of faith. The first step is to recognize the fact that your moods change. The next is to make sure that, if you have once accepted Christianity, then some of it's main doctrines shall be deliberately held before your mind for some time every day. That is why daily prayers, religious readings, and church going are necessary parts of the Christian life. We have to be continually reminded of what we believe. Neither this belief nor any other will automatically remain alive in the mind. It must be fed.
~ C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity

A Baby's Prayer

2008-07-02T05:27:00.001-04:00
http://www.youtube.com/v/oEoBm8sQe3s&hl=en"

I can hear her talking with a friend
I think it's all about me
Oh how she can't have a baby now
My mommy doesn't see
That I feel her breathe, I know her voice
Her blood, it flows through my heart
God you know my greatest wish is that
We'd never be apart
But if I should die before I wake
I pray her soul you'll keep
Forgive her Lord, she doesn't know
That you gave life to me
Do I really have to say goodbye
Don't want this time to be through
Oh please tell her that I love her Lord
And that you love her too
Cause if I should die before I wake
I pray her soul you'll keep
Forgive her Lord, she doesn't know
That you gave life to me
On the days when she may think of me
Please comfort her with the truth
That the angels hold me safe and sound
Cause I'm in Heaven with you
I'm in Heaven with you

~ Kathy Troccoli

Sweet Peyton

2008-06-05T14:46:00.001-04:00
My Chocolate Lab, Peyton was hit by a car and killed this morning. She wasn't even 2 yet. :-( I am biased of course, but she was an AMAZING dog. Every day when I would come home from work, she would excitedly greet me at the door. If I was ever upset, she would lick my face, and every night she slept in my sister and I's room, ususally in one of our beds. :-P I've had her since she was just eight weeks old. If I had to describe her in one word, it would be loving. She was an extremely loving dog. To say that my family and I are going to miss her would be an understatement. Now I know why they call dogs a man's best friend.

"Give Me Your Eyes"

2008-06-04T15:26:00.000-04:00
="http://www.youtube.com/v/G3sQ3NEqFdg&hl=en

Looked down from a broken sky
Traced out by the city lights
My world from a mile high
Best seat in the house tonight
Touched down on the cold black top
Hold on for the sudden stop
Breath in the familiar shock
Of confusion and chaos
Are those people going somewhere?
Why have I never cared?

Give me Your eyes for just one second
Give me Your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me Your love for humanity
Give me Your arms for the broken hearted
For those far beyond my reach?
Give me Your heart for the once forgotten
Give me Your eyes so I can see
again
again
yeah
yeah

Step out on a busy street
See a girl and our eyes meet
Does her best to smile at me
To hide whats underneath
Theres a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie
Too ashamed to tell his wife
He's out of work
He's buying time
Are those people going somewhere?
Why have I never cared?

Ive Been there a million times
A couple of million eyes
Just moving past me by
I swear I never thought that I was wrong
Well I want a second glance
So give me a second chance
To see the way you see the people all alone

Give me Your eyes for just one second
Give me Your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me Your love for humanity
Give me Your arms for the broken hearted
For those far beyond my reach?
Give me Your heart for the once forgotten
Give me Your eyes so I can see
again
again
yeah
yeah

The Next Step

2008-05-28T04:57:00.001-04:00
Well here I am......I've been wide awake since 2AM. I have been battling insomnia since last August. :-( I can't complain though because it has become a LOT less frequent since then, and the LORD has provided what i need to continue working and to make it through each day inspite of my exhaustion.

I read this today and was blessed.......

THE NEXT STEP

".......I view our spiritual journey as just taking the next step. I find that hard. I want to know the whole game plan. I want to know what roads I will be on, where they will take me, how long it will take and when it will happen. But as a follower of Christ, all I have to do is take the next step.
Some of the steps are confusing to me. They don't look as if they are leading forward, and I get frustrated and impatient. When that happens, I have to remind myself of two things: God is in control and He has promised to complete the work He began in me. He may not do that in ways that make sense to me, but I have His promise that what He began, He will finish. All I have to do is take the next step. "

Lord,
When the road ahead is dark, be my light.
When the path is rough and stony, be my guide.
When the wind is fierce and in my face,
When the world is such a barren place,
Lead me on,
Lead me on,
Lead me on,
Amen.

~Sheila Walsh ~ Gifts For Your Soul

Memorial Day

2008-05-27T04:15:00.000-04:00
To say that I had a wonderful Memorial Day would be an understatement! I got to see the sunrise this morning as I listened to Meredith Andrew's songs, "You Invite Me In" and "The River," what a blessing! I got to take my dog Peyton for a two hour walk in this GORGEOUS weather! Then I had breakfast with the fam as well as some members of my "adopted" extended family ;-). After that, I was off to spend a few hours with my dear, dear friends, the O'Hara family which is ALWAYS a great time of encouragement and blessing! I am SO sad that they are moving back to Fresno, California in less than 8 weeks now! I shall have to relocate to the West Coast, at least for a while! haha. Let's see, after that I hung out with one of my dearest friends Jessi, and ate Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream from Mannings! :-) YUM.....and then it was off to WIRED (My single Bible Study Group's) picnic at Kellie's house. Great day full of friends, fun and blessed fellowship! :-) :-) :-) Thank You Father!

GIFTS FOR YOUR SOUL - WAIT FOR GOD -

2008-05-26T04:54:00.001-04:00
Welp, here it is, 4:30AM and I am WIDE AWAKE :-(. I decided to make use of my "extra" awake time and read and write down some thoughts from the daily devotional I am reading by Sheila Walsh. I was really blessed by what I read, and thought I might share some of it with you! It is called........
WAIT FOR GOD

"All human love bears within it the seed of betrayal; it is a failure of love........

"When Judas who had betrayed Him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty silver coins to the cheif priests and elders. 'I have sinned,' he said. 'For I have betrayed innocent blood.'"
~Matthew 27:3-4

"What lay under that act of betrayal? Perhaps a deep thirst to right all wrongs now, to grasp hold of justice with his own two hands and pull it into his world.
I see Judas's life as one that spoke of impatience. I see a deep thirst for more than the life he had lived as a young man.......Deep within his soul he was thirsty for a different life, but he wasn't willing to wait for the "something more" that Christ would offer.

Even in the end, after the betrayal, Judas could not hold on. Now he stood with the rope in his hands, clenching the tool that would end his miserable life. His heart thundered in his ears, his stomach retched. What a fool he had been. His mind treated him to a picture show of a thousand memories that had brought him to this moment. He felt he had no choice but to end the life that had tipped the first domino for someone else. He could not bear to think of Jesus now. He could not bring himself to watch what he had participated in. He threw the rope over a sturdy branch.......But if he had waited three more days He would have seen Christ risen from the dead."

" When we abandon ourselves to hopelessness, we remove ourselves from Christ, our only hope.......Augustine said that our hearts are restless until they rest in God, but we try all sorts of things to still that pounding in our heads and the ache in our souls."

"There is no doubt that what Judas did was the ultimate act of betrayal, but I think of the words of Jesus on the cross: 'Father forgive them for the know not what they are doing.' I wonder if Judas was one of the people on His mind."

"Our impatience to have God move now, to act in ways that make sense to us, will drive us to take control of our lives. God is moving in ways that we cannot see or understand. This means we are left with the question, 'Do I trust Him?' We can choose to bow the knee now and ask Him to forgive us for trying to squeeze the answer we want out of heaven, or we will bow the knee later in remorse at our foolishness in thinking that we knew better than God."

"We are all thirsty in different ways, deep down in our souls. It is a thirst as ancient as the hills. But it is a thirst that can be satisfied only in Christ."

~Sheila Walsh

Lord,
Forgive us for our impatience.
In our restlessness give us peace.
In our impatience give us hope.
In our thirst for You refresh us, we pray
Amen.

My New Favorite Verses!

2008-05-25T23:37:00.000-04:00
Ephesians 6:19&20

"....Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly as I should."

"With Hope" by SCC, in honor of his precious daughter Maria

2008-05-24T07:46:00.000-04:00
>http://www.youtube.com

This is not at all how We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you
We had so many dreams
And now you've gone away
And left us with the memories of your smile
And nothing we can say
And nothing we can do
Can take away the pain
The pain of losing you, but ...

We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, oh no
And we can grieve with hope
'Cause we believe with hope
(There's a place by God's grace)
There's a place where we'll see your face again
We'll see your face again

And never have I known Anything so hard to understand
And never have I questioned more The wisdom of God's plan
But through the cloud of tears
I see the Father's smile and say well done
And I imagine you Where you wanted most to be
Seeing all your dreams come true
'Cause now you're home And now you're free, and ...

We have this hope as an anchor
'Cause we believe that everything God promised us is true,
so ... We wait with hope And we ache with hope
We hold on with hope We let go with hope

Thoughts

2008-05-04T16:11:00.000-04:00
I just started reading a book by Sheila Walsh called "Gifts For Your Soul." I am only four brief chapters in, and I have already been very blessed, challenged, convicted and encouraged. Here are some thoughts on gratitude that have really stuck with me....

"We all have losses in our lives. But if we choose to feast on them every day, they numb our souls to the good with which God has gifted us."

"You hace a choice. You can spend your life being angry at what you did not get out of life or you can count your blessings for what you have."

"We can choose to remain in a sleepy sluggish state regretting what is not, or we can become alive and fully awake to what is good and true about our lives."

"Cultivating gratitude removes us from being victims to being free to love and act as we are called to do"

"I know that life can be hard sometimes, and I encourage you to take time to grieve your losses, but do not be defined by them. Use them by the grace and strength of God as stepping stones to a deeper life, a life of peace, a life lived with a thankful heart."

Captivate Us......the prayer of my heart!

2008-05-02T23:45:00.000-04:00
I heard this song for the first time today and it gave me goosebumps, what a beautiful prayer. I pray it blesses you as much as it did me!

value="http://www.youtube.com/v/zIJR0h6BDTY&hl=en

Your face is beautiful
And Your eyes are like the stars
Your gentle hands have healing
There inside the scars
Your loving arms they draw me near
And Your smile it brings me peace
Draw me closer oh my Lord
Draw me closer Lord to Thee

Captivate us, Lord Jesus
Set our eyes on You
Devastate us with Your presenceFalling down
And rushing river, draw us nearer
Holy fountain consume us with You
Captivate us Lord Jesus, with You

Your voice is powerful
And Your words are radiant bright
In Your breath and shadow
I will come close and abide
You whisper love and life divine
And Your fellowship is free
Draw me closer O my Lord
Draw me closer Lord to Thee

Captivate us, Lord Jesus
Set our eyes on You
Devastate us with Your presence
Falling downAnd rushing river,
Draw us nearer Holy fountain
Consume us with You
Captivate us Lord Jesus, with You

Let everything be lost in the shadows
Of the light of Your face
Let every chain be broken from me
As I’m bound in Your grace
For Your yoke is easy,
Your burden is light
You’re full of wisdom, power and might
And every eye will see You

Captivate us, Lord Jesus
Set our eyes on You
Devastate us with Your presenceFalling down
And rushing river, draw us nearer
Holy fountain consume us with You
Captivate us Lord Jesus, with You

Oh so tuckered out.....

2008-04-28T07:25:00.001-04:00
This past week was an AMAZING week for me inspite of battiling severe insomnia since Wednesday night. Thankfully, I have an apt. with my Doctor tomorrow, so hopefully we will be able to figure this all out. I can't complain though, because I've gone from having insomnia, EVERY single night, to having it only 6-7 nights out of the month, so we are making progress! Thank you LORD!
As only HE can, God has just poured out His grace and strength to make it through the work week. Humanly speaking, it makes absolutely no sense. I shared a testimony in church yesterday about what a blessing the previous week had been, and my Pastor joked that if I was that excited when running on two hours of sleep per night, imagine what I would be like with 7 or 8! :-) Being a child of God is SUCH an exciting and incredible gift that is so completely undeserved. I can't help singing and shouting HIS praise as Chris Tomlin says in my favorite song of his. We do indeed serve a GREAT GOD, and I am so humbled and in awe of the fact that I get to be His child! God bless your day today! ~Mel

Trip To Lancaster.....

2008-04-25T00:22:00.002-04:00
Ok, so I posted a bunch of pics from our trip to Lancaster last weekend, but they posted in the opposite order I wanted them to.....so if you just scroll ALL the way down (past the About Me section,) and start at they very LAST picture, the captions should make sense! :-P

New

2008-04-11T00:59:00.000-04:00
I am new to this blog spot thing and this is my first official post......hello!