Be Still My Beating Heart...

Dear Friends,
I write this to you to ask you to pray for me. My dear friend Kristi is writing a book about responding in a godly manner to disappointment/suffering. I met Kristi ten years ago when I was a freshmen @Baptist Bible College and she was working at the shool as the Student Activities seceretary. Kristi has been serving in Berlin, Germany as a missionary with the Association of Baptists for World Evangelism for almost 6 years now. Her ministry there is THRIVING, and God is doing some VERY exciting things through Krist in the lives of the people she is serving. God had laid it upon her heart to write a few chapters herself and then have dear brothers and sisters of hers in the Lord write chapters that deal with suffering in other areas of life. Kristi has also found it important to have all the contributers be 35 and under as she falls into that age bracket herself. Sometimes we as younger generation Christians are caught off guard and find ourselves reeling a little bit when we are hit with some of life's devastating circumstances such as disappointments due to sudden loss of close loved ones, chronic physcial illness, infertility, miscarriages, broken relationships, etc.

Long story short, Kristi asked me over a year ago to write the chapter about chronic physical illness. My first response was yes, and then came the onslaught of self doubt...."You have struggled so hard during your battle with Bipolar disorder and have often screwed up, made mistakes, sinned, doubted God's presenece with you, etc. I have voiced these fears to my Mother, and to Kristi, following with ..."but I know God wants me to do this....and this is about Him.....NOT me." God has done amazing things in me heart, thinking, life, etc. over the past 4 years since my battle with this illness began. I have shared those amazing things on my blog, in person, and in personal journals. I have prayed that God would help me to walk this road well, that He would give me the strength to honor Him, and glorify Him on this journey He has me on. Never in my life has something scared me this way, but my Heavenly Father has not given me a spirit of fear, but of love, peace, and a sound mind. Deep in my soul I know without a doubt that this is of God. He will do with what I write as He sees fit, and as I pray over every word, and ask Him to get me out of the way....He can accomplish great things! His WORD and the anchor hold He has on my life are what need to be shared. Will you pray with me? The chapter is "done" and ready for me to email to Kristi....She has had EVERY other chapter completed, edited, etc. for months and has been more than patient with me as she is excited to get it to the publisher. Please pray that it won't be authors' stories that readers will walk away remembering. Pray that they will be blown away by the person of Jesus Christ and the work He has done in each of our lives. Please pray that their lives will be saved and changed as a result. Thank you in advance for praying with me! ~ Melody Joy